5 Things Happy Couples Do

2-11pm

As I look at my happily married friends, and I’m pleased to say there are quite a few of them, I notice a number of things that they do. Marriage is grown. It’s like two trees planted a few feet apart. As these saplings grow, their branches begin to intertwine. These branches become firmer and stronger the longer they are there. There things are like a few of those branches. There are others, but the ones below are simple ones that give a sense of security within the relationship.

1. Happy couples accept one another. 

Happy couples accept each other unconditionally and encourage the other to strive to do the best they can do. They accept the other’s flaws and don’t expect their spouse to change those things they can’t. You will never see a happy couple harping on at one another about a personality trait that irritates them. They focus on their good points, embracing their unique qualities and striving to understand what makes them tick. Happy couples know that a fish can’t be a parrot, so they don’t try and make them into one. They encourage their fish to swim and not to try and fly!

2. Happy couples protect each other.

Happy couples protect the other’s reputation and never talk critically about their spouse to others. They don’t gossip about their spouse. They are confidential about personal issues and weaknesses. In public, happy couples build each other up and never, ever pass a criticism in front of friends or family. If there is a criticism to be made, it’s made behind closed doors and within a safe and loving framework. It’s never intended to harm, but to help. Criticism between happy couples is constructive. Because it is seldom given and the relationship is safe and secure, when it is raised, the person on the receiving end is open to it. Happy couples do everything within their power to protect their marriage.

3. Happy couples encourage the others interests.

I’ve found that couples are happy when they share interests but not necessarily all of them. They may do a number of things together, but not everything. They are comfortable in allowing the other to pursue their interests, giving them support and  freedom to spend the required time. There is flexibility, interest and understanding. There is also humour and laughter and enthusiasm while doing life together.

4. Happy couples make sacrifices.

This is a big one. During the course of marriage, sacrifice often has to be made by both parties. Marriage has so many seasons. In autumn, the trees sacrifice their leaves for the coming winter. In spring, the leaves return – another season begins. As life ticks by, we have different needs. Children come, priorities change, health issues arise; we grow and develop and mature. Through it all, sacrifices are made by each spouse at different times. The feelings are mutual. As one needs more help, more help is given. Happy couples understand that sacrifices have to be made. They strive to work for the mutual benefit of this magnificent God given partnership.

5. Happy couples appreciate each other.

Happy couples reaffirm one another. They build up and don’t break down. They encourage compliments and resist conflict. They strive to contribute to the relationship and avoid anything that will contaminate it. They appreciate the strengths and don’t envy the victories. They are each other’s biggest fans. They speak words that are kind and loving. They are not competitive. They are always on the same side. They are a team and build one another up. They work together.

That’s what I have seen when I have looked at the happy marriages in my circle. It’s refreshing and a blessing!

1 Corinthians 13:4 comes to mind…

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.

Keep the smile going!

God Bless you!

In His Grip,

Helga xx 🙂