Roadrage – Children Learn What They Live

3-07pm

I was speaking to someone the other day who had an unnerving experience on the freeway. He was driving behind a slow driver and wanted to overtake. He checked his rear view mirror – there was a car quite far back in that lane, so he started to pull out. The car, a big 4×4, accelerated rapidly, so by the time my friend looked again, it was almost upon him. He hastily swerved back behind the slow vehicle. After the 4×4 had passed, he overtook and continued driving. By now, he was behind the 4×4. To his amazement, he saw a man driving aggressively with his wife beside him and his three children in the back. My friend laughed out loud at the shock of behaving like that in front of his family. Unfortunately, the driver of the 4×4 saw him laugh and was outraged!! There followed an unnerving display of nothing less than road rage towards my friend, slowing right down in front of him on the freeway and almost daring him to overtake. The incident ended when the 4×4 took an off-ramp, stopped his car, got out and as my friend passed by on the freeway, hurled a spate of abuse at him….. all in front of his wife and three children.

Children learn what they live. When our children see us parents behaving in a certain way, they copy us. They will take on good behaviour, which is great, but they will also take on bad behaviour which is not so great. I’ve been watching the story of an American doctor. Dr. Kele Sewell’s story is one of him drinking beer as a toddler. He grew up saying he would never be an alcoholic, like his father. Yet when adulthood arrived, he was addicted, not only to alcohol, but also to prescription medication. Being a medical doctor, they were not difficult to get his hands on. Here’s his story…

When I was a child, I remember looking at my parents and believing everything they did was right. In my young eyes, grown ups were always right – they were adult – they had all the answers! That is how you think as a child.  Yet, when we look around us, adults all over the place are falling apart. Jails are full of them.

I learned, as a teenager, that my parents were not perfect. When they separated and couldn’t get on with each other, I realised that adults can make mistakes. They can actually behave like children. There was a defining moment that changed my life when I was 14. It  went onto influence my adult behaviour. I came to know the Lord, which was the turning point. Feeling the security of having a relationship with God stabilised me in a way I never thought possible. In hindsight, the magnificence of that moment changed not only me, but would also influence the generations to come. Living in a fallen world, none of us are perfect, but when we  know our Creator and start depending more on Him and His Word and less on our own human failings, our paths become straight.

In adulthood, I noticed I was being drawn to some of the same negative behaviour my parents had displayed. I have made mistakes that I am ashamed of. By God’s grace, I did not continue with them. It doesn’t matter who you are, or what your parents did. You are responsible for your behaviour – don’t blame your genetics for your bad temper, drinking issues, addictions, affairs, bad habits.  You don’t want to continue them and pass the same toxic conduct onto your children.

We are the grown-ups. We don’t want to go backwards. We need solid food. The writer to the Hebrews wrote: (Hebrews 5:12)

“In fact, though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you the elementary truths of God’s word all over again. You need milk, not solid food!”

The driver of the 4×4 would do well to go for some anger management, just for the sake of his children. That hectic abusive behaviour will be passed on without him even knowing it.  I hope he recognises it before it’s too late.

Let’s strive to be teachers, strong in society, following hard after Biblical principles, loving God, loving people.

Keep the smile going.

God bless you!

In His Grip,

Helga xx 🙂

Gratitude Pic…new taps….the others didn’t know if they were hot or cold!