A Wobbly

1-47pm

Yesterday afternoon, reality began to set in a bit. Suddenly, I was overwhelmed with fragility, vulnerability and sheer fear! This leaving Rise and Shine now feels like a death-defying leap! Crazy hey!? My heart was pounding and my mouth was dry. What was I thinking? Getting up at 3-35am and doing the show was my security blanket. It’s time to let it go and trust God rather than trust in Rise and Shine! Whew! There was only one thing to do…I cleaned out cupboards! 🙂

Today, I continue to feel fragile! I can now put it into words. I feel like I’m ending a long term relationship. The roller-coaster emotions and insecurity that go along with a breakup – maybe even a divorce must feel like this. I am extremely grateful that it is not a divorce! I have been so extremely happy in my job, it is a great blessing that I struggle to let go!

So if you have come here feeling miff and miserable, moenie worry nie, it will pass! Just chill and know that time passes and you will feel better!

One of the ways of moving forward is to focus on other things. You WILL NOT believe the intruder I had in my house this morning! It was the weirdest thing! I get up early to pray and read my Bible, so it was about 4-30am. I had just finished doing my Bible reading, when I looked up and there across the carpet hopped very slowly and with much dignity a Western Cape Leopard Toad! Yes! In my lounge! I was gob-smacked! I called for Mike, but he was fast asleep. Mr Toad (or maybe Mrs) carefully snuck under the couch. I got down on my hands and knees and captured the moment. I am SO pleased I did, because I wouldn’t have believed it if I hadn’t….

I finished my writing and then went upstairs to call Mike. By the time we got down again, Mr Toad had vanished, never to be seen again! But I have the photo to prove his visit! 🙂 My plan was to catch him, stick him in a shoe box and take him to CCFm for Hanniki (CCFm’s resident Toad Lady). When I told her, she was outraged! “NOOOOOOO!” she exclaimed, all horror struck. “If you are caught transporting a Western Cape Leopard Toad, you could get fined R10 000!” Just as well we couldn’t find him. Not that I would have been caught. In 10 years of driving to CCFm in the early morning, I have never once been stopped by the police to inspect my car for stray Leopard Toads. They have two days left!

While the toad was under the couch, I was writing this:

Jesus came to earth for several reasons. The main one was to take the sin of the world upon His shoulders. When on earth, He said a whole lot of things that reassure us of all the riches of His presence and His purpose. In my reading of the Gospel of John, I came across a seldom quoted verse. John 17 verse 13 is part of a prayer Jesus is praying,

“I am coming to You now, but I say these things, so that they may have the full measure of my joy within them.”

Jesus was filled with joy or else He wouldn’t have said that. What is amazing is that this was shortly before His death. Regardless of your circumstances today, you too can have the full measure of the joy of Jesus. Seek it out by spending some quiet time with Him today, speaking to Him and resting in His presence. Joy will come and along with it, love, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness & self-control – all fruit of the Holy Spirit. That will be GOOD!

God bless you today!

In His Grip,

Helga xx 🙂

Gratitude Pics…Crazy Cat Pictures…Truffles was sleeping on the car as I reversed out the garage….

Clearly unhappy about being disturbed…

Thinking about how to get off this thing…