Tuesday
Dear Elsie
This is probably going to depress someone! Recently, I’ve been thinking about the brevity of life. I’m 60 and the years ahead are far less than those behind. As I started the book of Exodus the other day, I was struck by the starkness of a single verse that in one fell swoop, wiped out an entire family & their parents. Dozens of people, rich with life and heritage, movement and wealth, heartache and joy, facing life and death, gone. It’s Exodus 1 verse 6 that says “Now Joseph and all his brothers and all that generation died…” Pretty much died and forgotten because 2 verses later, “Then a new king, who did not know about Joseph, came to power in Egypt.” All of Joseph’s wealth and power in Egypt is forgotten. How fleeting life is. I know my great grandmother’s name was Aga. I have her trunk which is easily 140 years old now.
But I know nothing more about her. Elsie, you will grow up knowing something about me, but very little about my Mother – your great grandmother. Let me tell you about her. Her name was Elizabeth Ann Davies and she was born on 23rd April 1932. I know she lived in Croydon, just outside London. She was the youngest of 4 children, with 3 older brothers named Peter, Michael & Ian. Earliest photo we have of her from Julian’s collection is with her 3 brothers.
As a young girl…
Peter moved to Canada. Michael died very young – in his 40s of a heart attack, but not before having about 4 or 5 children. Ian married Rosemary, but they never had kids. My Mom met my Dad when he rented a room in the building next door to her home. It was the mid 1950s. My Mom came from a somewhat well-to-do family and my Dad didn’t. Their relationship blossomed but, we believe, was frowned upon by my Mom’s family. As a result, she left England for Canada and went to stay with her brother Peter. My Dad upped sticks and joined her. They married in Canada in October 1956. They were both 24 years old.
They planned a large family but my Mom’s first pregnancy was an ectopic. She lost a fallopian tube but it didn’t stop my sister Anne arriving in December 1958 and my older (late) brother Arnold in June 1960. Both were born in Toronto. When Arnold was 6 months old, in the grip of winter, they packed up their little family and they emigrated to what was then Rhodesia. Julian was born in October 1962 and I followed 2 years later in November 1964. Their family was complete. More early photos of her, most of them from the year they married. The baby is Arnold.
Financially, life was hard and it took its toll on their marriage. They split in 1977. I left for Cape Town in late 1982. By then Anne had married Derek and they, along with Arnold and Julian had all moved to Johannesburg. Eventually, “Ma” as she liked being called, joined them. Ma’s life changed when she was 60 (my age!). She started going to church and found a wonderful community of ladies with whom she shared many happy times of fellowship and friendship. She was diagnosed with breast cancer when she was about 62. She had a mastectomy and chemo and recovered well, but after 5 years, she had to come off tamoxifen, as it’s not recommended for longer than that. Some time later, the cancer returned in her other breast and she had more surgery. It was very hard. The cancer spread and eventually, on this day, 28th January 2004, she slipped away.
Elsie, now you know a little about your Great Grandmother. I think there are a lot of characteristics I inherited from her. She was good with people. She was good with words. She loved life. I think my eternal optimism is from her. There is always hope. She finished strong – she’s in heaven. One day, we will meet again.
Like the Bible verse, I can say “all that generation died”. We are next!
As I sat at my Mom’s bedside while her life ebbed away, I read to her Psalm 23. Every 28th January, the Psalm from my Bible reading is this very psalm.
Psalm 23:4
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.
Death – I fear it not.
It’s not about now – we are only passing through.
Keep the smile going.
God bless you.
In His Grip,
Gran xx 🙂
