“I don’t trust them anymore” was something I found myself writing to someone this week. It’s a heavy-duty sentence, loaded with implication. How I respond towards this person from now on will be with a great deal of hesitation and suspicion. And so once more I found myself mulling over the whole issue of trust. In relationships it is so important.
Trust is one of those things that we mostly take for granted as it subtly impacts our lives each and every day. It is only when it is broken, that it, or the pain of the lack of it rises above the surface in a leviathan of an ugly way. You suddenly realise how important it is…and how fragile.
I remember being in a highly trusted position, where my trust and integrity were never questioned. Suddenly there was a big change of people in that organisation…and the new people didn’t know me. It came as a unpleasant surprise to have them view me with suspicion; they questioned my motives and – they didn’t seem to trust me. My only solution was to keep going. I just had to do what I had always done. I have nothing to hide. I believe I am trustworthy. I try not to have ulterior motives!
But what if trust is broken due to betrayal? The process to healing can be very long. There needs to be repentance, forgiveness & restitution. Then there has to be a regaining of trust…one day at a time.
Work hard at maintaining your trustworthiness. Be above reproach. When trust is lost, it can be found. If trust is broken, it can be repaired. But it takes time and it all starts today. We have to be trust-worthy every single day.
When I started working on Upwork as a freelancer, the issue of trust was at the very forefront of the start of each contract or job offered. Did I trust this company? Did they trust me? I would Google the company’s name – find out about the owners – snoop around on their website to find out their credibility. I didn’t want to end up working for a pyramid scheme (which I nearly did) or an adult only company (which I nearly did) or any organisation that would compromise my values (which I nearly did).
When I did connect on Upwork with a company called Edvectus, I clicked immediately with the founder and her amazing team. I knew they didn’t know me. I had no credibility in their eyes. I had to start at the bottom and earn their trust. Next month I’ve been working for the company for 2 years and the other day I was talking to the MD and I asked her if she was okay with me working so many hours. She said the words that made me smile, “I trust you,” she said. While I was happy to hear them, I was also aware that they had been earned and to keep them, I was going to need to continue to be trustworthy.
When someone breaks trust, I would never say to them, “I DON’T TRUST YOU!” but I store up a degree of reservation in my heart that makes me guarded towards them.
It’s the words of Jesus, recorded in Luke 12:48 that come to mind,
From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked.
My takeaway for today is for me to be trustworthy. For me to live in obedience to what God wants me to do. And I have to admit, the words of Andy Stanley quite often roll off my tongue. If a major move is lying ahead of you and you have ANY reservations about it, ask yourself this question,
In light of your past experience, your current circumstances and your future hopes and dreams, what is the wise thing for you to do?
Andy also says, ‘pay attention to the tension.” If it doesn’t feel right, it probably isn’t.
God has given me much – He loves me and He trusts me – I need to be faithful to Him first.
These are the days.
Keep the smile going.
God bless you!
In His Grip,
Helga xx 🙂