A Family At War – This Is What I Choose

11-36am

It’s so tough when you see a family at war….bickering, arguing, jealousy, greed, conniving, deceit, betrayal all under one roof.  It should not be.

It’s hard for me to find an illustration, even in the Bible, which displays the kind of family life I believe God intended. I guess when Adam and Eve fell  and sin entered the world, that was pretty much where perfect family harmony ended.

This morning I read a devastating messy exchange between Jacob and his beloved Rachel. He had served her father for 14 years in order to marry her. He loved her, desperately, but they couldn’t have children. She was mad at him for that. Genesis 30:1-2 – drama queen Rachel expresses her devastation…

When Rachel saw that she wasn’t having any children for Jacob, she became jealous of her sister. She pleaded with Jacob, “Give me children, or I’ll die!” ² Then Jacob became furious with Rachel. “Am I God?” he asked. “He’s the one who has kept you from having children!”

What followed was a series of messy exchanges. Rachel gave Jacob her servant to have children with her. Leah had already had children and when she stopped, she gave her servant to Jacob to bear more children. It became an angry competition

If you want your marriage to go well, there has to be sacrifice. I once heard someone whose marriage hand ended say that in marriage, they sacrificed themselves. In divorce, they sacrificed their children. Children are always going to be the losers when a marriage fails.

While I can’t control others. I can control myself.

From choosetolivebetter.com

• I  choose love.
• I choose to bite my tongue and not lash out.
• I  choose to be patient.
• I  choose to  speak worthy words.
• I choose to build up and not break down.
• I choose to be my husband’s biggest fan.
• I choose to be my children’s biggest fan.
• I choose to encourage instead of criticize.
• I choose to defend instead of mock.
• I choose to humble myself.
• I choose to serve.
• I choose to listen and not interrupt.
• I choose to fight for my marriage.
• I choose to put God first and seek Him in all I do.

Hey! It’s not easy. I didn’t say it was. But these are choices I can make. These are the choices that change my marriage and my family.

I’ve written here before that I understand divorce happens and that it is not the end of the world. While God hates divorce, He allows it. It doesn’t stop Him loving you. Some couples have been divorced for years before the papers are signed. God sees our hearts. He sees what goes on within the walls of our homes.

• I choose not to be the cause of a divorce.
• I choose not to be a source of grief.

Last night I applied for an Odesk writing job that (surprisingly) asked what I loved most about my life. My answer was:

“What I love most about my life is that I know God and that one day when I die, I will go to heaven. The 2nd  thing I love about my life is that I have a husband who loves me!”

• I choose to believe God and trust Him.
• I choose to be grateful for my husband who loves me!
• I choose to contribute and not to contaminate.
• I choose to smile.
• I choose life.

I’ve made my choices. How about you?

Keep the smile going!

God bless you!

In His Grip,

Helga xx 🙂