Meeting Sarah…The Other Woman…

1-37pm

Here’s some more of the story en route to how Mike & I got together. You’ll have to go to previous blogs to catch up if this is your first visit. Someone asked me today about the use of the names Philip and Sarah. It is a true story. It is my story. I’m not revealing their surnames. I doubt very much either one will read my blog. Neither are in South Africa and although my blog is read by people throughout the world, I doubt Sarah will remember me or my name so the chance of her stumbling upon this blog is most unlikely!

Anyway, here we go…

Sarah arrived in Cape Town and initially stayed at a Christian hostel in Muizenberg. It was inevitable that our paths would cross. After all, Philip and I were both going to Holy Trinity Church and she would be there too. Philip was working in Cape Town. I was at College in Observatory and had most afternoons off. Philip and I arranged for me to catch a train to Muizenberg, meet Sarah and then join up with him later at his flat in Kenilworth for dinner.

Meeting Sarah for the first time was a curious event. I was now 19 and Sarah was closer to Philip in age, maybe 22. I didn’t know much about Sarah, but Philip had told me she could sing and she was highly intelligent, two facts I would soon experience first hand.

I caught the train as planned, got off at Muizenberg and walked a short distance to a Christian hostel on Atlantic Rd. I was nervous, not sure what to expect or how I would be received. I entered the building and spoke to the receptionist, telling her I was there for Sarah. She sent a message up to her room. I heard Sarah before I saw her. She came downstairs singing at the top of her voice. I felt like running away! I was already intimidated by her and now I knew for sure, I just could not compete. She had a massive singing voice. I Helga, am tone deaf. I cannot hold a tune, let alone sing a decent note. Sarah’s voice boomed through the building, confidently and perfectly. I cringed. Everyone knew her – they smiled and joked and I felt very, very small and unnoticed. Sarah and I greeted each other and then went for a walk. I cannot remember what we spoke about but I do remember her being very cheerful. We ended up walking back to the Muizenberg Pavilion and she brightly announced, ‘let’s call Philip.’ Without hesitation, she went to the call box and started phoning Philip. He was at work and took the call. They chatted about the evening plans. She told him where we were and said, “Come and pick us up.” He was sitting in his office in Cape Town. He caught the train to the office every day, so picking us up entailed catching the train back to Kenilworth, walking to his flat, picking up his car and driving down to Muizenberg, only to turn around and take us back to his place again. It was completely impractical, so I said to Sarah, ‘let me speak to him.’ I took the phone and said, ‘Don’t worry Philip, you don’t need to pick us up. We’ll catch a train back to Kenilworth and meet you at your flat.” He was so appreciative. Sarah was furious! She said something about us being worth the inconvenience. I replied that it was so much simpler just catching the train. Off we went to the station. Sarah sullenly took her seat opposite me. She became very quiet. Her body language spoke volumes. In a new country, with everything different, one would have expected her to at least look out the window, but she sat leaning slightly forward, staring almost at the floor. I asked her if she was okay. “I just get very quiet when I’m angry,” she said. “Ohhh, ” I thought, deciding it was best to keep quiet. But I have to admit, I felt a little smug! The rest of the journey was spent in silence.

We arrived at Kenilworth and got off the train. I led the way to Philip’s flat. Once there, her quietness was over and she was all happy and ready to socialise. We sat in the kitchen while Philip made dinner. I remember him saying something like, “I can’t believe I’m sitting down and having dinner with both of you together.” I couldn’t either! It was the only time we did that. I never saw Sarah alone again.

I felt I was no match for her. She was beautiful, talented & intelligent. Even though my head was saying breaking up with Philip was a good idea, my heart was in pieces. I threw myself back into college work. I generally saw Philip and Sarah on Friday evenings when they helped at the youth meeting and on Sundays. I didn’t know if/when they would be there. I went into auto mode, just going to church and going home. Sometimes I would see them at Gardens Centre, holding hands and chatting. I found it physically painful to watch them.

People in the church weren’t so sure about what was going on. They knew Philip and I had been in a relationship and now here was Sarah. I threw myself into my studies. Weeks passed and then one night I was called to a phone – it was Philip. I was thrilled to hear from him and I recall wanting to stay on the phone for as long as possible. I didn’t want to hear about Sarah. He asked me how I was and I told him I was ‘okay.’ I was way too proud to come to close to admitting that I was hurting and struggling. He suddenly became very emotional – I could hear he was upset. He apologised if he had hurt me at all and said he was so sorry and he hadn’t wanted things to turn out like this. I was confused. I didn’t know what he was talking about. It worried me. I felt he was sending me a message to say that our relationship was more over than I thought it was. I thought it was ‘on hold’ but this conversation made me think that maybe Sarah had been successful in her quest to get Philip back.

I became more desperate and when Philip phoned me quite late one night a little while later and asked me if he could take me out for coffee there and then, I didn’t even hesitate. I went from depression to elation in 30 seconds. He picked me up at about 10pm and we went … I can’t even remember where. We did a great deal of talking, trying to find our way back to the fun conversations we used to have. Something had changed. Everything was emotional. This wasn’t the Philip I had known. I clung to him, not wanting the night to end. I didn’t want him to go back to Sarah. I was desperate to know that he still loved me and that we had a future together. I tried pushing him into a commitment of some sort. He wasn’t giving me the right answers! Eventually, he dropped me back at the college at about 3am. I knew I would be in trouble the next day… and I was. I was called to the Supervisor of the Nursing Students, who also happened to be the head of the Christian Union which I attended. I was embarrassed and said it wouldn’t happen again. It didn’t.

Where was God in all of this? I was clinging to the knowledge that God is sovereign and that He knew exactly what was going on. But the internal upheaval was overwhelming. I was a fragile creature, crying out for affirmation, and I was losing the one person on earth who I thought would ever love me.

The days ticked by. I counted them. Eventually, Sarah’s visit was half complete. We were on the back nine now and I knew, without a shadow of a doubt that Philip would come back to me before her plane was fully airborne. I was feeling more confident as time went by. My exams were finished – I passed well. I moved back to Somerset Hospital Nurses’ Home.

Soon, the final week of Sarah’s visit arrived. She was leaving the next Sunday. I was counting the hours. I went to bed on the Wednesday evening of that week. At 1am, there was a knock at the door. It was the night matron. ‘There’s someone to see you,” she said.

More tomorrow! 😀

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Back to today’s world! This morning on Rise and Shine Wayne spoke about photographing patterns. So after the show and before Bible study, I stopped by Fish Hoek Beach and took some photos. These are of shapes and patterns that are not seen on postcards of our picturesque town.

Crossing the tracks…

Railway tracks Paving…. More paving The Curve….